chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
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