it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize