There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
