Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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