Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
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