Me. At least after what I've been through.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
Randomize
