I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I wish I could punch you in the face.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Randomize
