dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
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they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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