So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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