This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Walk of Shame today included voting.
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
