this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
