this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
me + whiskey = a bad person
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