Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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