So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Your penis caused this!
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