So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
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