Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Randomize
