I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
