I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Don't EVER smell your tampon
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
