You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
Randomize
