So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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