Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Randomize
