so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Randomize
