just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
I love you. Go after that dick
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
