therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I saw a groundgog last night outside my back door. I now have a new wedding gift idea.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Randomize
