i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
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