i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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