The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
