Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
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