Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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