Who wears a wallet chain?!
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Randomize
