Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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