Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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