it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.