Texts From Last Night

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  (954): View more from Florida

  Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.

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  (954): Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay. http://tfl.nu/sog2
  Replies (45) Good night (903) Bad night (2241)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.

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  (732): The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made. http://tfl.nu/5n54
  Replies (12) Good night (1430) Bad night (4353)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.

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  (780): we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said. http://tfl.nu/m7ps
  Replies (22) Good night (1168) Bad night (2673)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?

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  (720): i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do? http://tfl.nu/0v59
  Replies (21) Good night (7814) Bad night (726)
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  (507): View more from Minnesota

  Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life

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  (507): Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life http://tfl.nu/jtus
  Replies (21) Good night (3530) Bad night (600)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.

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  (248): the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks. http://tfl.nu/qak2
  Replies (10) Good night (954) Bad night (8494)
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  (985): View more from Louisiana

  Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!

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  (985): Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!! http://tfl.nu/9t2j
  Replies (60) Good night (6272) Bad night (1745)
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  (+64): View more from New Zealand

  I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer

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  (+64): I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer http://tfl.nu/8v2s
  Replies (14) Good night (1673) Bad night (3474)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?

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  (419): I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat? http://tfl.nu/2nrh
  Replies (30) Good night (1169) Bad night (4191)
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  (707): View more from California

  then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"

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  (707): then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure" http://tfl.nu/54yc
  Replies (15) Good night (1326) Bad night (3846)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.

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  (304): Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me. http://tfl.nu/4mjy
  Replies (14) Good night (3119) Bad night (1123)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.

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  (910): Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job. http://tfl.nu/jru8
  Replies (6) Good night (3213) Bad night (759)
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  (478): View more from Georgia

  You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable

  (318): View more from Louisiana

  You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.

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  (478): You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable (318): You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call. http://tfl.nu/575v
  Replies (13) Good night (2654) Bad night (769)
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  (251): View more from Alabama

  why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?

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  (251): why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us? http://tfl.nu/6pdz
  Replies (3) Good night (1675) Bad night (508)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7

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  (330): Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7 http://tfl.nu/w1wq
  Replies (4) Good night (989) Bad night (881)

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