it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I should have been on a postcard. I was sitting in the middle of the forest with a plate full of pot brownies and missing you.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize