I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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