Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
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