Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
