if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
