Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize