so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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