Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Listening to my boss get blown in the next room by a male bartender from the gay bar. And watching pawnstars. Tell me I'm not the best wingman ever.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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