You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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