my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
