wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
