so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
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