I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
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