My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
