I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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