I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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