69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
