Can Purell be used as lube?
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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