your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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